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    [N/A] Don't Cry For Me

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    LauzieeLoo
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    Posts : 507
    Join date : 2010-12-09
    Age : 21
    Location : Australia~!

    [N/A] Don't Cry For Me

    Post by LauzieeLoo on Sun Jun 05, 2011 11:32 pm

    Brother, don't cry for me.
    I can no longer stay.
    Brother, please don't cry for me.
    The pain will go away.
    Brother, wipe the tears away.
    You have to play along.
    Brother, hide the tears from me.
    I must know that you'll be strong.

    Mother, don't cry for me.
    Please stay by father's side.
    Mother, please don't cry for me.
    Even after I have died.
    Mother, it is not your fault.
    It's a choice that I have made.
    Mother, it's my own choice.
    I never could have stayed.

    Father, don't cry for me.
    It's what I choose to do.
    Father, please don't cry for me.
    It's my fault, it was never you.
    Father, hold Mother closely.
    Help her keep her smile.
    Father, look after brother.
    He might be lost for a while.

    Sister, don't cry for me.
    I know you cheated and lied.
    Sister, please don't cry for me.
    I forgive you, don't lose your pride.
    Sister, hold me close to you.
    You'll be the one who sees me die.
    Sister, my heart now belongs to you.
    So there's no reason to say goodbye.


    Tell Me What You Think~ Thankyou For Reading Smile


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    JaDe&AmBeR4eVeR
    f(Amber)
    f(Amber)

    Posts : 305
    Join date : 2011-06-04
    Age : 20
    Location : USA

    Re: [N/A] Don't Cry For Me

    Post by JaDe&AmBeR4eVeR on Mon Jun 06, 2011 2:22 am

    This is so beautiful!!!! Did you write this??? Its amazing!!! Very Happy
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    december12
    Saranghae Amber!
    Saranghae Amber!

    Posts : 122
    Join date : 2011-05-24
    Location : Phnom Penh, Cambodia

    Re: [N/A] Don't Cry For Me

    Post by december12 on Wed Jul 06, 2011 5:34 pm

    AMAZING !!!
    it doesn't contain enough rhythm, though .
    I really love the last part and I really like the other 3 parts too.
    All you have written are perfect, but can you tell they all exactly mean ? Maybe the concept ??
    Cus it sounds so sad Sad

    Hope to see more from you Smile
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    LauzieeLoo
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    Posts : 507
    Join date : 2010-12-09
    Age : 21
    Location : Australia~!

    Re: [N/A] Don't Cry For Me

    Post by LauzieeLoo on Thu Jul 07, 2011 12:12 am

    ^^ Yeah, I often have troubles finding a rhythm in poems because if I want to use a certain word in one line, it's final and then I have to end up changing the words around it to fit. XD

    This one, well it's a bit darker than my other ones, it's basically like a suicide note sort of thing... Yeah...

    Not that I'm planning suicide or anything, don't get the wrong idea ahaha ^^

    Thanks for reading, guys! ^^ I'll try write another soon!


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    december12
    Saranghae Amber!
    Saranghae Amber!

    Posts : 122
    Join date : 2011-05-24
    Location : Phnom Penh, Cambodia

    Re: [N/A] Don't Cry For Me

    Post by december12 on Thu Jul 07, 2011 1:50 am

    Haha, i know that you're not planning to commit suicide....
    So that what it means. Good.

    For the next poem, why not make something peaceful like friendship stuffs ? Or funny ? [ Hmm...i don't know if there's any funny poems, just saying Smile ]
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    LauzieeLoo
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    Posts : 507
    Join date : 2010-12-09
    Age : 21
    Location : Australia~!

    Re: [N/A] Don't Cry For Me

    Post by LauzieeLoo on Thu Jul 07, 2011 8:59 am

    ^^ That's actually a good challenge! I'll try make something happy~
    I love new challenges hehehe Thanks~ ^^


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